Street challenge

You start at Carr’s Corner, take a deep breath and begin.

You must first negotiate the ‘Stepping Stones from Hell’.

Will they tilt to the left, or tilt to the right? Will you twist an ankle, or break a bone?

As you progress look out for speeding mobility scooters.

They whizz past you from behind, or just come straight at you. Funny how their horns never work! Well done if you are now at the Guildhall and still standing.

But, you are still not safe. In the vast expanse of yet more dodgy slabs and stones, and criss-crossing silent scooters, the charity muggers and mobile phone sellers lay waiting, strung across the High Street.

Few escape their attention.

If you are lucky enough to make it to the Time Mosaic, take a short break as the worst is still to come. The disabled parking bays!

They turn into the High Street hell bent on parking, no matter what. Even when all the places are full, waiting cars drive back and forth until a place becomes free. Three-point turns, turn into ten-point turns as they turn around, people dodging out of the way and the drivers seem completely unconcerned.

All this in a so called pedestrianised area!

Well done if you are now standing by Bridge Street.

Careful as you cross as the 20mph limit seems to mean nothing to any driver.

PS. Should you not make the challenge, there are plenty of solicitors to help you with you claim!

John Bickell, Pilgrims Way, Andover.