ENTERING motherhood for some, can be one of the most difficult transitions you will ever make. Your whole self-identity shifts in an instant. Immediately your family and friends are coming to see your new baby, and not you. Then there are the family and friends who haven’t been there in a way you hoped for.

This can be for multiple reasons. But, in hindsight the woman you were before motherhood is essentially gone.

Some people you grow with and other people you simply grow away from. Big life events can show who is there for you and who simply isn’t. This can come down to many factors. Sometimes, it can be because the old you may have had a higher tolerance for nonsense and unfulfilling situations. Being around selfish, self-centred people may not have affected you before motherhood. But, now you are a mum, your own needs and wants have also shifted. Time becomes limited and rare.

When you do have time you want to be surrounded by the people who generally care, support you and lift you. You know, the sort of people who feel like sunshine.

So, now is the time to back away from the negativity in your life and that includes negative people. Negativity breeds more negativity. A pessimistic outlook can drag you down. You’re responsible for your mood and outlook - don’t let anyone else sour it.

The life you had before motherhood has essentially gone, and motherhood can feel overwhelming on the daily. You have little to no time to yourself. When you do have time spare, make sure you spend it with the right company. This in itself can have such a positive boast on your well being and self-worth. It’s in these moments and among the genuine kind souls and other like-minded people you will feel supported.

This in effect can positively support you to keep going day by day and adapt to the big life changes motherhood brings. It’s every bit as important to put yourself first in parenting as it is to put yourself first in an emergency. Engage in the things you generally want to do, not just because you feel you have to do. And remember, self-care and erasing negativity can have lasting benefits for both you and your family. Small steps create big smiles.